The principle of mass conservation, is widely used in many fields, and states that for any system closed to all transfers of energy and matter, the mass of the system must remain constant over time. In every subject, theory always seems to be so great, but in practice is not as simple. As in matter a fact is way beyond my comprenhension.
I just received an important news, in which everything in my life will need to transfer, and I’m not sure all my energy and matter will remain constant. I felt fear and anxiety, feelings that I’m not use to feel and manage correctly.
Thanks to everyone around me I am feeling strong, and it’s not the end of the world, is just the end of the world that used to be under the control of my own decisions.
LIFE: Thanks for being so unpredictable, and for giving me occasionally reality slaps, even though they hurt.
Sometimes when I’m alone, for example when I walk through a long corridor, I start hearing voices from the past. I mean, it’s not that I’m crazy, it’s just that my brain starts to rewind to specific scenes and situations that once I lived with certain people. But I recently read in a psychology magazine that our memories are not entirely true, they are what we have interpreted as a result of our own experiences. That made me wonder why some of us keep on making the samemistakes.
I’m not going to let my daytime worries creep into my dreams, as one wise friend once told me: ” We have first world problems“. That’s totally true. So let’s start by not listening to the voices from the past, and start learning other languages instead, so that from now we can listen only to new voices.
For as long as I can remember, being normal was not my goal. Always dreaming about awesomeness (like the PhD). Maybe it was not my entire idea, perhaps I’ve been influenced by social media. But what it’s true, is that normality is underrated. Sadly most of us are society dams, seeking to achieve a dream that doesn’t belong.
To this day I declare I want to be normal, have an ordinary life. ¿What’s wrong with that?
Thankfully, the nature of each person finds it’s way.
Once upon a time….
Once I decided to enter in the scientific world. At that time I just had finished my bachelor degree, travelled for a while during university, mostly for studying different things.
After diving into different subjects such as botany, genetics, organic chemistry, and cetaceans, I decided I loved insects and I was confident in getting a scholarship.
So my journey started, and at the beginning I saw everything with positive and enthusiastic eyes. The years went by, and an intellectual crisis begun, so strong that actually everything went so gray almost black to the point that I started feeling this project of life was endless, and it was stopping me of really living life, and enjoying it.
Today after 6 years I just gave in with resignation, not everything’s in my power and I just made a promise to myself: stop feeling frustrated.
From now on I’m going to keep fighting, but I’m giving more energy to other aspects of my life that are broken because of this phd dream.